Posted by giveawayboy on July 09, 2002 at 23:08:23:
In Reply to: Re: thanks for those pieces john..... posted by john on July 09, 2002 at 10:57:56:
Wow, Bill this was incredible. I like it when you run off and loose yourself.
Thanks. I only wish I really could. If my inner man remains unchanged then there has been no journey.
Anyway, the images flashed so fast that I can't respond in any itemized manner.
Oh good!
The anemone got me hard. I was reminded of the Oumou in Nausiccaa.
I remember the Ohmo, but I recall it being from some movie called WARRIORS OF THE WIND or something like that. Anyway, I recall this movie, which I had seen twice in the 90's. I loved it! It was actually my favorite anime until I saw NEON GENESIS EVANGELLION and LAIN, both w you darling.
I also like the invitation thing. .......I remember praying desperately for an experience that would leave me so changed that i would never be able to deny it or go back. ......I always thought that prayer went unanswered until reading your post. It wasn't the post itself, but something in the spirit of it that opened my mind to see that this prayer had been answered in a way that I couldn't have expected.
that just goes to show that it was a catalyst or vehicle to your transformation.
It wasn't really a pinpoint incident, but then it was also, only I didn't realize it. ......I have seen that invitation and I now can't quit seeing how the pieces fit. I don't have all of the pieces, but I see clearly how the ones I have fit.
this is good to hear.
I know this doesn't make much sense, but for those who are lost by my babble, it is like solving a coded message, or descrambling a very complex video image.
you got me thinking of how the military used to use the navajo language.
You know you're on the right track, but you can't really lay out for tohers how to get there.
yeah, it's like stringing beads. You have to show them all these different beads and then you have to go into a secret place and find the string that unites them. this is the awesome yet normal work of the everyday disciple. you have your spiritual discipline, whatever it is. for us christians it would be the work of prayer perhaps, bible study, almsgiving, etc. whatever, visiting our neighbors. you do that work in secret. you string your beads in secret. later you have a nice mala or rosary or whatever and it is evident that you have a sacred tool, a sacred vehicle. then others might ask, and you've been sharing beads w them. random beads. then soon, they too will want to disappear and seek the string that unites the beads in their own life, to create their own string of precious beads. this has nothing to religiosity, but true religion, going into a secret place, finding the face of the divine lover. you go into darkness and plumb the depths and you come back later and your beads are not seen as independent little treasures, but they all are one great treasure. we each have our own life, or way of manifesting. as christians, we believe god put these original instructions in us and we go out and those instructions manifest. we look and we string the beads. there is no way to impart it to others if we don't have it ourself. but it takes silence and disappearing. this can't always be a monastic silence, but I'm speaking of an interior quiet. soon, others will see your string and begin to see ways that they can string theirs together too. it's a little different for everyone.
And this isn't universalism, which you know I can't stand.
neither can i. it sounds presumptuous and irresponsible to me.
So anyway, I started this with the caution about asking for things because we often aren't prepared for the consequences. For example the frustration that comes with viewing the world in a way that you know most people won't ever be able to see, or even validate.
but we must not assume that about people. i know it's been hard in your own experience. but we must keep expecting more out of them, for we are them.
later John, Bill