Posted by jeannie on July 13, 2002 at 17:20:56:
In Reply to: Re: on being alone, mentors, accountability, etc. posted by k@ on July 10, 2002 at 15:31:58:
: That is fantastic! I am so glad you shared that! I have been through similiar things, but for me it's hard because I haven't had the luxury of being alone in sooo long...
: Many people will consider being alone a curse, but sometimes it is from God.
: I think this is true for singleness too. You have to see it as a gifted time, because the intimacy you can have with God is interrupted so easily when there someone to share your time with..
: But that is off the subject. One thing I wanted to say about mentoring-
: I hope this doesn't offend ,but I really believe it is a major commitment to someone, whether it is a spoken agreemnet or a non-verbal understanding. To have that type of relationship with someone, I think you really have to be willing to BE someones mentor first. I think that means YOU have to be willing to be called in the middle of the night, to meet when it's not convenient, and YOU have to be willing to listen for as long as you can to someone else unloading. I think that is quite a sacrifice to be a mentor, so if you want a mentor you have to be willing to do the same for someone else.
: Unless of course I just have a different picture of what I think a mentor is supposed to be.
: A mentor role could be filled by a number of different people I suppose...
: To hold each other accountable, what exactly does that mean? How does that happen practically?
first of all, i am sooo sorry for just now responding, but i am STILL getting used to checking up on all the follow-up posts.
anyway, i really don't know why for me, it had to be such a loooooooong ordeal and why it was necessary for me to isolate myself through it. i only know that god loves me and knows what he's doing!
as for the subject of mentoring, i think everyone has different ideas and expectations of what a mentor is supposed to be. i have had several mentors throughout my life, each at times when i've needed help in specific areas. the important thing i've learned in regards to this, however, is that the lord provides us with what we need when we need it. he is our perfect father. with that said, i don't really concern myself with whether or not someone will meet my expectations of them.
accountability is really related to mentoring, in my opinion. in many ways the lord teaches us to understand the spiritual world by paralleling our life in this world. for example, the father and the son. the loving, mature father teaches his son the way he should go, guides his steps along the way, all the time knowing the child will eventually become a teenager and rebel. the loving father also knows in his wisdom that this is a very normal and necessary part of growing up and gives the teen some space, all the while waiting for him to get through the stage so he can continue. see, in the spiritual world, god exists without the restriction of time. he is the same yesterday, today and forever. the same... meaning he DOES NOT change. this is something to really ponder.
as far as your question about holding someone accountable, i think this needs to be considered on a purely individual basis, depending on the people involved and the particular circumstances. personally, i am not really the kind of person who is comfortable "checking up" on someone else's life. i don't feel it's my duty to tell someone how to live their life. my hope is that in some way my life would be seen as a good example to others, so when they do ask my advice on something, my words will mean something.
pssssssst. by the way, what's your name??