Posted by Disaster on August 02, 2002 at 12:29:06:
In Reply to: more on properly interpreted biblical passages posted by john on August 02, 2002 at 06:35:09:
What about robots playing football? "And it came to pass..."
: There has been debate about what many ancient peoples actually looked like and what role black Africans played. But we know that in at least one location a prominent historical figure was of color because the old testament clearly states that the three friends cast into the furnace were Shadrach, Meshach, and A Bad Negro.
: : What would Jesus drive ...
: : Some people assume WWJD is for "What would Jesus do?". But the initials really stand for "What would Jesus drive?"
: : One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old Plymouth because the Bible says, "God drove
: : Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in a Fury". But in Psalm 83, the Almighty clearly owns a Pontiac and a Geo. The passage urges the Jews to "pursue your enemies with your Tempest and terrify them with your Storm". Perhaps God favors Dodge pickup trucks, because Moses' followers are warned not to go up a mountain "until the Ram's horn sounds a long blast".
: : Some scholars insist that Jesus drove a Honda but didn't like to talk about it. As proof, they cite
: : a verse in St. John's gospel where Christ tells the crowd, "For I did not speak of my own Accord..."
: : Meanwhile, Moses rode an old British motorcycle, as evidenced by a Bible passage declaring that "the
: : roar of Moses' Triumph is heard in the hills".
: : Joshua drove a Triumph sports car with a hole in its muffler: "Joshua's Triumph was heard throughout the land".
: : And, following Jesus' lead, the Apostles car pooled in a Honda... "The Apostles were in one Accord".