Posted by giveawayboy on August 13, 2002 at 18:23:07:
In Reply to: Your prayers - and an anniversary story posted by Pastor Steven on August 12, 2002 at 18:26:21:
: A story...
: About a month ago, I was burying our little red raccoon Cyon. Earlier that morning I had found him dead. I was really hurting, because I knew Cari was going to be devastated when she arrived home later that morning. I was praying God would give Cari the assurance that little Cyon is not lost; that everything he is, is safe in God who created him, loves him, and gave him to us in his love; that nothing so significant and precious could ever be lost in God; that we will certainly see him again and rejoice. God reached out to me there by that grave, and I realized a deep sense of purpose in everything--in our lives, in our love, in our pain, in our hope, in our deaths. It was all beautiful, it was all fashioned in infinite wisdom, it was all wrought in unfathomable love, and it was all very much on purpose--according to the purpose of Him in whom all exists, who works all things according to his good pleasure. As I was awake in this reality, I pondered my own death and thought about the day when the earth I had just moved with so much toil would finally cover my own grave. I thought about how Cari would mourn. I thought about Cari and me, and the beauty of what our lives meant together. I thought how empty my life would be without her, how perfect she was for someone as quirky and trying as me, and what a miracle it was how much she genuinely loved me. And then I knew--I just knew--that she was the best woman that had ever existed or ever would exist FOR ME; that God had created us for each other, and planned it before the dawn of the universe, and I was overwhelmed. And then, as a sort of strange afterthought (I love the duality), I asked God, "Did you really just tell me that?" And instantly, the Spirit flowed through me like a tidal wave and made me tremble; God said, "I told you."
: Things like this are hard for me to share. But for some reason when I am sharing with my flock, my family, I am given a special grace so I can express these things. Without this, they would stay locked up in me like a hidden treasure. I was led to share this story one day in church, but my wife was in Arizona and did not hear.
: It has been sixteen years since I married this wonderful lady, and I am more thankful for her now than I have ever been. I am truly blessed.
: Happy Anniversary, Cari. I love you.
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Steve, I loved this story. I am so happy that you met Cari. She is a great woman. I hope she can see that. I hope she takes time to see that in herself. It's God's gift to her. Anything good in any of us is God. But, Cari is like a ROCK! She is real strong in certain ways. She might appear frail at times, and she might BE frail at times, but under that there is depth to her that I'm not sure she is even aware of. She actually holds alot of people together in her thoughts and prayers that ARE powerful. There were lots of times she could have given up on God and her friends, but she didn't. And I for one am thankful. She also has a way of creating a sense of family. I love her more when I stop to think about her. Also, I'm proud as hell of her going for her teaching career, furthering herself in school, doing photography, a zine, etc. Cari is really special. Yes Steve, you found a really great gal. I hope if I ever do the whole marriage thing, that I find a girl as good as Cari too. I'll be a lucky man!
Peace, Bill