Posted by Mister Metal on September 09, 2002 at 10:31:23:
In Reply to: My prayer for you posted by quequel on September 06, 2002 at 18:40:38:
: Hey, dude. I have days like that--they're called PMS. I take St. John's Wort, wear silk, eat chocolate, and sleep. I pray that you will be filled with a sense of the all-enveloping Love that God has for Raulito. He has a way of talking in whispers until we have to turn our "tapes" down to hear Him. We all have "tapes" set on instant replay. Tapes recorded in childhood or early relationships, that say, "You suck, you'll never make it on your own, you are the reason I have to do horrible things, you're a sissy, you're a loser, you hurt everyone you touch, you can never be truly loved, even by your wimpy god..."
: They play so loudly that we can't hear the whisper in the maple trees or the mantra in the waves that says, "I love you, I gave everything I had for you and would do it again even if you were the only man on earth, I love you, I created you because I took joy in the creation, I love you, I am still creating you into My Image, look at this world, it's not just dark corners, it's light and wind and thunderstorms and art and potential and skillfully played guitar and laughter."
: I pray that God will give you light moments that overpower dark memories. I pray that He will teach you not to abuse yourself worse than you were ever abused. I pray that you will take back your future, so that those tapes that wasted so much of your past will not be able to steal the next 30 years.
: Laugh, take people at face value, turn your gaze outwards and see that noone but you hears the tapes. Turn your gaze outwards and see that you are one part of eternal glory that starts here. See the humor in humanity. When someone says, "I love you," (and we do), take it at face value. Know that they will probably hurt you (even more than once) because they're fallible, but accept the goodness of that pure moment and the potential for hurting but not losing the relationship.
: Okay, I'm babbling incessantly--somebody stop me! Good talking at you, Raul!
yeah i know we never talk..as i am this yung "jit" who feels kinda not relevant to people like ya..but thanks kristi...and yeah...um..thanks..
i hope it goes beyond this safely talkin behind plastic coated computer screens and oneday i can actually have some neat convo with ya..yeah...eh oneday...computers are nice..but talkin in person is so much better,is it not?? ;) well glad to have ya at church....