Posted by quequel on April 19, 2003 at 22:54:32:
Preface: When I first pulled up the site, there were no entries since 3/9. Whoops! Figured I'd post this anyway. "My Thoughts on Finding Myself Alone"
Wow! I haven't been here in a few weeks, which is a long time for me. I expected to be reading for days. What happened? Did everyone go on a webfast or something? Rapture?
I know, I know!
On Sunday, March 16, year of our Lord 2003, Nancy and Jason arrived at Steve and Cari's house to see Jon Vaughn running out of the house in a robe the color of his hair, chased by Mr. Lee wielding a lightsaber, black hair flowing behind him. Nancy screamed as Bill leapt from the roof to a shaky limb from Steve's freshly pruned tree, hissing, "It was MY HoHo!" Jon Vaughn turned his head and pointed at the car in the driveway--"Look!" he shouted. "Fire-breathing Brazilian frogs!"
As Mr. Lee glanced away, Jason tackled him with his bass amp. I always knew there was an anvil in there, and not wires that produced that THUMP-AAOW beat.
Cory drove up in a flaming chariot, Kat hot on her heels in her deep purple roaring El Camino, "The Parish-People Eater." Cory narrowly missed a loose Ferret with her front spiked wheel. Bill swooped it up with a long bandy arm.
As Jason helped Mr. Lee to his feet, Bill screetched, "Mine! Mine! Rainbow turtles to you all!" The Johns shook hands and made up, but right then, Steve finished printing his last term paper and lit the celebratory incense which extended precariously from the C-4 superglued to his hard drive. He dove from the study window with boyish glee and rolled under the jacked-up El Camino just in time.
"Free! Free!" He shouted, just as the angel with the trumpet (Tiny Tim), the angel with the Congas (Kris--though not mentioned in The Revelation, because it was assumed by the prophets of old that the groove of heaven was an accepted necessity), and the Metaterri rose into the sky proclaiming the rapture, taking a bejeweled Cari, hairstyles changing by the moment, and Nancy first.
Gosh, it's lonely down here. Who knew Tulsa would be the host of Armageddon? Well, maybe Oral knew.